Looking Forward to Being Less Sedentary
Being cooped up at home is definitely not healthy (mentally or physically) and I look forward to walks outside when the covid wave passes and the weather permits. I have to avoid the sun as I’ve had...
View Article#5. Letter to my Papa
Papa, so often in the past 19 years, there have been world events and even just local events that I want to talk to you about. Just so much of life is happening and it’s not fair that you’re missing...
View ArticleThought Process – Extreme Anxiety
I can’t sleep. Intense fear and anxiety. God please help me. Please let everything be ok. Please let it all go back to normal. I’m so worried. I’m afraid to fall asleep, because I’m afraid to wake up...
View ArticleWhy I Always Reach For Food
Wish I didn’t succumb to this, but I do, I always do. The lure of tasty food. I eat especially when I’m upset or often when I’m bored. Always for a celebration. Food makes me so happy and it’s what I...
View ArticleBeing Human
The inadequacy I feel is crushing. I can’t believe I am here. How did I even get here? I know the various traumas. I feel like a broken recorder. No one likes to hear complaints. Well perhaps you...
View ArticleWas the Pre-Smart Phone & Pre-Globalisation Era Truly Superior?
I tend to wax nostalgic, wistful for the bygone era – the nineties. I’ll admit bias, as it also happened to be the most carefree, healthiest and happiest time of my life. So I automatically connect,...
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I Don’t Like the Saying ‘New Normal’.
This term seems to have emerged during the pandemic, but a search on Wikipedia shows that it first appeared as far back as 1918. I don’t like it at all, as I don’t like most business jargon and also...
View ArticleWhat are the three best decisions you’ve ever made?
I keep dwelling on decisions I regret so I am keen to do this more positive exercise instead. In real time. That is, whatever I type right now will be published unedited. 1. Immediately I think of...
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One of My Mum’s proudest moments as a kid back in 1957
My mum always told me the story of how she failed primary 3 and had to repeat it. Every time, she sounded so sad and dejected. She only failed by 1.5 marks too and she was a sickly child. We were...
View ArticleAging Sucks
No matter what I hear about aging giving you more wisdom etc, to me it just plain sucks. I feel like myself on the inside, but the outside is betraying my identity. Don’t think I’ve changed much since...
View ArticleMy Partner’s Thoughts on Aging
Decided to ask B as well, after sharing my mum’s refreshing optimistic viewpoint in the last post. He’s usually a logical pessimist, while I’m a more emotional anxious person and we don’t always...
View ArticleMy Origin Story from the 70’s- thanks to my mum’s meticulous diaries
My mum shared an old diary of hers with me. “All my secrets” she said. She recorded all her purchases and gifts she received since the 1970’s. The first thing that struck me? Wow, the inflation. Cars...
View ArticleWhat it was like growing up in the 70’s and 80’s – corded, rotary and pay phones
To have privacy for my phone calls as a teenager, I had to pull the cord of the only home phone and I couldn’t even shut the door of my room as the cord was thick. You were restricted by the length of...
View ArticleMy Hysterectomy gave me a release I never expected
Till age 45 I still felt a vacuum inside and a longing for a child. It’s something I could tell no one. Most of my friends had kids and I felt alienated from them. Even at this late age it was still a...
View ArticleFeeling Lost today till a Stranger (not quite actually) & Kind Soul reached out
19 years ago I lost my beloved Papa and this whole week (the dates) are a reminder of my nightmares and trauma. I did things today, I would normally enjoy, but I couldn’t quite taste my food or have...
View ArticleTrying to be My Own Therapist & Psyche Myself Up
I want to be more in control of my life and not let my anxieties highjack my peace. I want to stop having insomnia and when I finally fall asleep, nightmares. My own perceptions of advancing age and...
View ArticleWhat I Wrote Yesterday Feels False
False in the sense that I’m forcing myself to sound more well and upbeat than I am. Inside I’m drowning. I never wrote about the times I have such intense fear that I feel paralysed into inertia....
View ArticleFascinated by Salman Rushdie revealing the best period of his life
If I could go back and relive any time in my life, I’d start in 1979. I was just finishing Midnight’s Children and my first son was about to be born. In fact, I remember telling his mother to just sit...
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Sentimental Value – 21st Birthday Gift from My Father
As I regularly try to declutter for my peace of mind I come across a lot of things I don’t use but can’t part with. If I go by Marie Kondo’s rule of keeping things that spark joy, I have a lot that...
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Travel: Longing for Things I Don’t Get in Singapore
Singapore is much safer and has generally much cleaner air than the cities surrounding us and for that I am grateful. It also has my home sweet home, my stuff and my own bed etc. Travel itself is such...
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